I disappeared again. The No Eating Out Challenge went fairly well although I did not succeed. It did get me back into a better groove and only eating out once or twice a week so that's better.
I met the lapband doc. He gave me a small fill and ordered an esophagram. I had the esophogram last week and the doc's office just called. The images look "odd." It looks as though the barium is outside of the band which would indicate an erosion. He wants to do an endoscopy to be sure. His office is emailing a couple GI docs that he prefers to use and they're going to call me to make an appointment. I'm not sure how I feel about all this. I'm scared and not sure if this is all my fault. Did I do something to cause it? I know I haven't been a good patient the last year or so. I need to do more research about causes but if has eroded, it will need to come out. I'm not sure how I feel about that part either.
For whatever reason, I'm really upset. I'm sitting here crying...but I don't really know why. I'm scared to lose the band. Angry at myself for letting this happen. Just needed to get this out there. Will keep you posted.
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9 comments:
I'm sure it is scary, but try not to obsess too much or beat yourself up until you find out what is really going on. So sorry you're going through this!
I'm sorry you are worried and I hope things are ok with your band... if you need to talk just let me know. I can relate to how you are feeling and if there is anything I can do to help just let me know.... hugs to you...
I lost my band in April and revised to bypass. I'm still coping with emotions surrounding this. If you still have my # feel free to text me if you wanna chat.
Sorry to hear about the troubles. I hope everything turns out ok. One step at a time. I'll keep you in my thoughts. Amy
I'm so sorry! I think being scared is totally rational. I would feel the same way. But take one step at a time. Thinking of you!
Hopefully if your band is indeed eroded, you can revise if that is something you are interested in. I can honestly say it is the best thing I've done in the last few years.
I'm sorry to hear of it possibly eroding. And you should vent and try not to beat yourself up too much. No matter what wls a person has, its hard work forever. I just had a revision from the band to the sleeve a little over a week ago (no issues with band other than not losing) but I know going through it all over again 5 years later, it was still scary and many thoughts crossed my mind.
So sorry. I know exactly how you feel. My band is coming out in 10 days. I blame the band, not myself. You will have a lot of questions and a roller coaster of emotions. Just breath. A solution will present itself. Tracey
Amanda,
How did things go? Can you give us an update. Was just thinking about you yesterday! Amy
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