Day 75 Weigh In

PreOp Diet Weigh In: 226
Surgery Day Weigh In: 218.5
Day 75 Weigh In: 201.5

Change Since Last Week: -2

2 lbs down from last week, meaning I lost the 1.5 gain from the week before plus another half pound.  Sometimes I really don't think they did anything other than take the band out.  The doc had said he couldn't make my stomach as small as he'd like because of the scar tissue and I know people who have already had weight loss surgery lose slower and not as much as "virgin" surgery people.  I guess I'm still just a little disappointed in how this is going.  I heard things like "I have to remind myself to eat" and "You're never hungry" and "I can eat so little."  It's bullshit.  I can eat a lot less but I'm constantly thinking about my next meal.  Is it in my head?  Absolutely.  That doesn't help.  That must makes me see that NOTHING Is going to work.  I'm always going to be fat because I have no willpower and can't get past my own brain.  So a little disappointed?  Yes definitely but not in the stupid sleeve...just in myself.  

Setting A Good Example

I saw an article on BBC about one of the youngest diagnosis of Type 2 Diabetes.  Article is here. The girls was just 3 years old and weighed 35kg.  I had to do a conversion on this and for my other metric impaired American friends, that's 77 lbs.  For childless friends who really have no idea about what kids should weigh.  My oldest weighs 73 lbs and she's 10 years old and mostly muscle.  The doctors believe it was caused by diet and lack of exercise.  This story has a happy ending.  The doctor who diagnosed the child apparently gave the parents a good wake up call and just 6 months after the diagnosis, she's lost almost 9 kg (20 lbs) and no longer needs medication.

How do we let our children get this way?!?!?  The article didn't provide a picture but I can imagine what the parents look like.  Most likely, they look like my husband and me.  One of my biggest motivators for losing weight and eating healthy to set a good example for my girls. I don't want them to struggle the way I have.  I don't want them to get bullied by kids in school.  I don't want them to have these types of health problems in the future.  I don't know how anyone could look at a 77 lb toddler and think that's OK.  That they're doing their job as a parent!  Your job is to protect your children and keep them healthy.  These parents were failing at that.  I'm glad they got the wake up call and I'm glad they changed their ways and this child is now OK, but I just can't believe it took their daughter needed diabetes medication (keep in mind this is NOT Type 1) in order for them to see they were hurting their child.

My sister gives me a hard time when she comes to visit about the kind of food I have in the house and how I don't let my kids have run of the pantry.  My kids have to ask if they want any snack other than fruit.  Her pantry is full of chips, crackers, sugary cereal, etc.  She thinks it's crazy that I make my kids waffles/pancakes/ and eggs or breakfast sandwiches every morning before school.  She asks why they can't make their own breakfast and I could just buy some cereal?  She really doesn't get it and as someone who LOOKS JUST LIKE ME, you'd think she'd already know.  She thinks it's "mean" that I "make" the kids eat the way I do.  Yes, my kids eat the same dinners I eat...protein and veggies and very little bread, rice or carbs.  That's OK!  They aren't deprived.  She doesn't see a reason to "push" this lifestyle on my kids since they're not fat.  She's right.  They aren't fat and with a little luck and a little education, they never will be.  Her kids aren't fat...YET.  Just wait until their little metabolisms slow down and they aren't running all over the place.  I'm not a food nazi.  We have treats (remember I had ice cream 3 times last week?).  They get to eat their Halloween candy.  They get birthday cake and celebrate stuff.  There's just no reason to have your day to day diet to be THAT processed and crappy.  *Stepping off soapbox*

This week has been a dud of a week and I'm glad it's nearly over.  Get through today and hopefully we'll reset with the weekend.  I hope you all get a chance to relax and reset too.

Is This Week Over Yet?

Where to start.  We'll start at the gym.  I went to the gym last night and was going to start my work out on the stair climber.  It's one of the ones that look like this;

I have a love/hate relationship with this machine.  I HATE it when I'm on it.  It's truly the devil but I LOVE how much I sweat the calories I burn on it.  Now I have used this machine in the past...no problem.  I am short so getting on is kind of a big heave ho to the first step but no biggie.  While there is always a little give to the steps when I stand on it, it certainly isn't fast and it's not like it's ON.  Well, last night, I went to step on it and it immediately gave way as if the belt was slipping and since I wasn't completely on the first step yet and couldn't get up fast enough, I fell straight down on to the gym floor.  The guy next me jumped off his to see if I was okay.  I was so freakin' embarrassed.  Another gym patron went and got an employee.  I felt like such an idiot.  The employee looked at the machine, deemed it broken and put a sign on it.  At least it wasn't just me being too stupid to use gym equipment but still.  So I had this internal conversation with myself as I'm trying to tell everyone I'm fine and get up with as much dignity as I could muster:

Me: "Self, I cannot believe I did that!"
Self: "Run!  Get out of here as quickly as you can.  You're such an idiot."
Me: "I don't understand how that happened.  Can I not even step up on to a machine anymore?  Have I gotten THAT fat and uncoordinated?
Self: "Yes you have.  And everyone is staring.  OMG.  They're asking if you need ice.  Answer them. Say no.  Say SOMETHING."

I mumble no to the ice and wave away the very helpful hand of the guy next to me to heave myself up into a standing position.

Self:  "Seriously, grab your keys, drive away and never come back.  You can never come back here.  Don't let your face turn red.  Salvage your dignity woman!"
Me: "You just shut up."

So I got on the treadmill instead.

Needless to say, it was a rough workout and by the time I got home.  I HURT.  The whole left side of my body hurt and still hurts today.

So this morning, I'm supposed to have my new mattress delivered. They gave me the very specific window of 8 a.m. - 5 p.m.  Fine.  I'm going to be home all day anyway.  I'm walking out of the house to walk the girls to the bus stop at 7:20 a.m. this morning when the truck is pulling up.  Of course they're early.  SIGH.  But then...BAM!!!  They ran over my mailbox!!!

I've already called Customer Service and am opening a claim.  The HOA here is super strict and all the mailboxes, posts, etc. are identical so I got the number of the company they use and left them a message this morning.  And now I have back to back to back meetings until 5 tonight.  Awesome.  Meanwhile, I'll keep icing my leg from last night's fall and just try to get through the day without killing someone.  At least I have an assistant to help me out.