I Wish Wednesday

I haven't done Drazil's Wednesday blog before so we'll see how we do with it...

I wish I had more mental strength.  Seriously...I get surgery to get a band to help cut portions.  That still doesn't change what I'm putting into my goddamn mouth!!!  I remember reading on lapbandtalk and blogs about people who get the band and even before their first fill, they're hitting up McDonalds or Taco Bell or downing oreos.  I remember judging this people (Bad Panda!) and thinking "Why would you do that?!?!  Why would you go through all the trouble to have surgery just to keep eating like you always did?!?!"  Well, you can add me to the list of crazy people who do this.  I have been eating like crap this week and just can't seem to shake it!  My portions are too big (I know I'm eating more than the cup to cup 1/2) and it's the wrong stuff! 

I wish I had more energy.  This stems from the last one...I know if I ate the right stuff, I'd feel better and have more energy but I'm not, so I don't and there you have it.  I wish I had the energy to hit the gym, cook dinner, play with the kids AND clean my house.  I wish I had the energy to do some fall projects, maybe make some Halloween cookies or crafts with the girls.  I wish I had the energy to reorganize my closet and finally finish my laundry room.  We moved in over a year ago and this is still the miscellaneous-crap-I-have-nowhere-else-to-put-it room.

I wish I had a closer family.  You know one of those always meets for Sunday dinners kind of family.  The ones who call just to chat, the kind you want to spend holidays with, the kind you actually want to take with you on vacation even after you all have your own kids.  This is not my family.  We all get along fine - with a few in law type exceptions.  My hubby loves my parents but not the siblings which makes it impossible to do anything as a group.  My sister lives cross country and my brother is going through a difficult divorce so things are just so BLAH in that area.  My in laws are even worse so there's no lovey dubby type vibes coming from the Midwest. 

I wish the lady who sits next to me who, despite being a nonsmoker, seems to hack up a lung at least 3 times a day, would just knock it the hell off!  I don't know what her deal is but seriously...she has cough drops in her desk at all times..why would someone need this?  Maybe she should go seek a professional medical opinion instead of relying on the Halls of Medicine to solve the problem.  I have sat next this woman for 2 years (very nice...had gastric bypass - but she doesn't know about my surgery - and is now one of those annoyingly fit aerobics instructors) and she has had a chronic cough for both of those years.  ENOUGH ALREADY!

OK.  I guess that about sums up what I'm wishing for here.  I have step class tonight...surely, I'll start getting better at them right?  It's not just the coordination that isn't coming along, it's the cardio part.  I seriously feel like I'm dying halfway through.  I also have a packing clinic tonight for the 3 Day.  It's hard to believe I only have 37 days until the big event!  I still have so much work to do.  They only allow you take one bag and it can't be more than 35 lbs and that's including your sleeping bag.  Egad!!!  How do you fit everything?  Hence, the clinic.  There's supposed to be volunteers and veterans at this clinic to give you tips and hints on how and WHAT to pack.  Looking forward to it...need to start preparing.  My BFF mapped out our next training walk for Saturday - 8.8 miles!  Holy shin splints Batman!  If I survive, I'll post our finishing time on Monday.  Hope y'all are having a great week!

Weigh In Weekend

Good morning!  Official weigh in day and I'm set at 210.  A 2 lb bounce from the all time low I saw earlier last week.  I'm attributing this to some water retention.  I had Chinese food yesterday and that usually has me retaining water for a couple days.  I do think my latest training walk contributed to my stagnant weight loss this week as I KNOW I did not drink enough water during this walk so I think my body is definitely still holding on to it.  My wedding band is tight and that's usually a sure sign of water retention for me. For the sake of honesty, I will say I did not eat particularly well this weekend.  While I ate a lot less than I normally would, the nutritious aspect was somewhat lacking and will definitely aim to do better this week with the eating.

I did my 7 mile training walk on Saturday.  Holy bugger!  I was doing pretty good until the 5 or 6 mile mark and that's when I started losing it a bit.  I made it in 2.5 hours (includes a pit stop and small detour) so the pace is right on for what they're looking for.  The Komen site says to aim for a 20 minute mile.  Important to remember that we're walking 60 miles in 3 days so endurance is more important than speed in this case.  I was seriously SORE when I finished up the walk and stayed that way pretty much for the rest of the weekend.  It was the good kind of sore where you know you've used just about every muscle in your body whether it wanted to be used or not so that's definitely a good thing.  I'm thinking next weekend, I will aim for 8 or 9 miles.  I'm not ready for 10 yet.  I'm not sure if it's a mental block or what but I do know I was seriously hurting doing 7 so I think it's better to ease up to 10.  That's what I'm going with anyway.  This walk reiterated how far I still have to go to be able to do 20 miles a day for 3 days.  I still think I can do it but I have to keep stepping it up each time to make sure I don't just die somewhere during the day on Day 2. 

As far as the band goes, while I can definitely tell it's in there...a couple of stuck episodes with certain foods remind me, I REALLY hope I can get my first fill at my doctor's appointment on Oct 14.  I can definitely still eat way too much at one sitting and I'm hungry every couple hours.  I'm trying to use good snacks - fruit, cheese, etc. for when I'm getting hungry but would really like to get the ball rolling with this restriction stuff.  The doc gave me 3 cc's at the time of surgery but since I don't know how big my band is (one of those questions I just keep forgetting to ask. LOL) I'm not sure if that's just a drop in the bucket or what.  I'm guessing it's a 10 or 11 cc band as he said it was "standard" (at least that's what he told my hubby).  If that's the case, I think I still have a long way to go before the "sweet spot" but I'll take whatever help I can get. 

That's it in Pandaland.  Hope everyone's having a marvelous Monday and had a fantastic weekend!  And so another week begins...

BYOC

1. Are you late, early or on time?


Before children, I was always early...at least 10 minutes.  Now, I'm RIGHT ON TIME.  There's no wiggle room so if traffic's a mess, I'm screwed.  This drives me absolutely crazy.  I can't wait until they are old enough where I don't need to get them ready to go and they move faster than a snail's pace.  I agree with Drazil on this one...I think being late is kinda rude.  I have friends who are chronically 30 minutes for everything.  What makes them so special?

2. Name 3 things you dislike and 3 things you like:


Dislike:
Having no money by payday
Political bumper stickers
Atheists who can't accept Christians and Christians who want to shove God down everyone's throats (Explanation: I'm a news junkie - always on cnn.com or usatoday.com and somehow the arguments often wittle down to the existence of God.  It seems that some atheists think anyone who believes in God must be a complete moron and probably need help tying our shoes.  Then there's always another person who answers the atheists quoting bible verses and condemning them to hell and damnation...as if this argument means anything to an atheist.  I just don't know why we all can't agree to disagree...)
 
Like:
When my kids are acting all sweet & happy
Going to the movies (I only do this maybe 3 times a year these days...such a treat)
Sleeping in
 
3. Are you a morning or night person?
 
Prechild, I was a night person.  Up all night, slept during the day...never woke up before 11.  Now that I'm a responsible parent of two...I guess I'm a morning person.  I mean I get up at 4 a.m. to go to work and my kids are up by 6:30 even on the weekends.  Do I like it?  No.  I yearn for retirement. 
 
4. What is your favorite clothes store?
 
Fashion Bug.  They have regular sizes and larger sizes.  The larger sizes are the same styles as the smaller ones (over all) so you don't feel like they're trying to make you look fatter by putting huge flowers on things. 

5. Repeat question: Summarize your week in life and in blogland.

My life was beyond dull this week.  Work was crazy busy with meetings and home life was seriously lacking quality time.  I'm hoping I can get on a better schedule with things and have some more energy to do stuff with my girls.  Blogland was pretty dull as well.  It was consumed by Chicago.  The pics are great but not many posts coming out of it.  Those of that didn't go were whining about not being able to go. I look forward to when the time comes for normal blogging again.  I miss the regular posts and progress of other bloggers.